Wednesday, March 27, 2013

25 Ways Dogs + Babies Are Exactly The Same

I've been a mom to fur babies long before Brody came along. While pregnant, I was convinced that Peanut, Zayla and Zora had somehow prepared me for motherhood. Boy, was I right. Granted, Brody is only 4-months-old, but so far, Tank and Terror are pretty much the same:

  1. In order to avoid scrubbing carpets, there's absolutely no hesitation to stick out your hands and catch whatever bodily fluid may be coming atcha.
  2. Saying phrases like "don't eat your hand" and "how did you get poop on your foot" are super legit. And pretty common.
  3. Never mind wanting the bathroom alone... I just wish I could pee without a paw scratching at my thigh for attention or a 18 lb. tank strapped to my chest.
  4. If either of them are within a 3 foot radius of you, there's a 94% chance you'll end up with some sort of drool, snot, urp or eye boogers on you.
  5. By far the best cuddlers... but usually only when exhaustion or sickness has set in.
  6. They're the reasons you "can't have anything nice."
  7. Completely desensitized to poop. 
  8. If they're awake and it's quiet... something bad is happening. Real bad.
  9. When all else fails, feed 'em.
  10. It's no big deal to have full-out conversations with them and then feel slightly insane completely normal when you consider that have no idea what you're saying and aren't going to contribute.
  11. It doesn't matter how deep of a coma-like nap they're in... as soon as you sneak into the bathroom to shower/poop/hide, all hell breaks loose.
  12. They are the best faces to see first thing in the morning or after a long day at work.
  13. Shamelessly stinky.
  14. You're expected to summon your inner psychic powers and interpret those blank stares and needy grunting noises.
  15. Together, they can make even the burliest of men turn to mush and go all sorts of goo-goo gah-gah.
  16. How they don't get super pissed about having to eat the exact same thing every single meal is beyond me.
  17. They both trigger some mommy hormone that makes you have super morbid nightmares about bad things happening to them. (That's normal, right?)
  18. Whether 9 or 90 lbs... the amount of poop that comes out of them is mind blowing.
  19. You can't stay mad at them. You just can't. That's why God made them cute. So we don't sell them to the gypsies when shit hits the fan.
  20. Eat. Sleep. Play. Sleep. Whine. Poop. Eat. Pee. Sleep. Poop. Play. Sleep. Eat. Pee. Play. Whine. Sleep.
  21. They're the reason you can have intellectual adult conversations about poop. "Did Zora go poop when you let her out? Yeah, but it was super runny... hope she's not getting sick. What consistency was Brody's poop this morning? Was it the stinky turtle eggs or yellow mustard mush?"
  22. They will sleep through anything... EXCEPT opening the treat cupboard/nursery door.
  23. Extreme neediness doesn't kick in until you are in the middle of something that requires both hands and/or undivided attention.
  24. Have I mentioned poop?
  25. They're both so worth it.

Tuesday, March 26, 2013

Brody @ 4 Months: What He's Up To

My little tank is going to be 4-months-old this Friday. I'm so blessed so have such a happy, easy-going lil man. Makes being a new mom and life in general a lot easier. Take a look at what Brody's been up to:

I guess I should just start calling him Tank. This week we packed away all of his 3-6 month AND 6-9 month clothes. Yup, that's right... we're in 12 month clothes already. Jesus.

I guess Summer just needs to hurry up and get here. Once the weather turns nice, our house is going to be clothing optional. Well, at least tshirt and undies. I know Brody can't wait. Kid's such a nudist. Any and all sadness immediately disappears as soon as his clothes do. Love it.

Brody also weighed in at 18 lbs 1 oz. last night. I know, right?! I should be ripped as hell from lugging this Michelin baby around. So watch out folks, if you come over this summer, it's just gonna be a couple of fatties sitting around in their underwear.

Brody's been maxed out at 8 oz. for awhile now. Still eats every 4 hours like clockwork. We've been putting rice cereal in his bedtime bottle since almost the beginning, but I'm really hoping Brody's doctor gives us the go ahead to start on other solids at his 4 month appointment. I don't think 8 oz. of formula is going to cut it for another couple months. Any other moms out there in a similar situation? Did you start your little one on solids before 6 months? Anyone else have a tank baby with an insatiable appetite?

Brody is a champ at bedtime. He's been on a really consistent schedule for almost 2 months now. He takes his last bottle between 6 and 7:00, slides into some jammies and goes to bed. No big deal. Even if he's not sleeping when we lay him down, he entertains himself for a little bit, then passes out. Best part? In the morning, his little internal alarm clock either wakes him up around 5:45ish or we have to wake him up at 6:00 to eat and get to daycare. Easy peasy.

No interest yet in rolling over, but he loves to stand and stretch his legs. Something about being diaper/pants-free makes him kick up a storm. He turns into mega-happy wild child in the tub and on the changing table. Also, although sometimes a bit roly poly, he does pretty well at sitting with a little support.

Within the last couple weeks, Brody has started to really enjoy his exersaucer, play mat and a few smaller/light weight toys. It's almost like he went from not grabbing or holding onto anything to having this death grip overnight. I'm so glad he loves his exersaucer... keeps him up off the back of his head.

He also loves "soooo big!" and peak-a-boo. Within the last two weeks or so, he's also started giggling. I love baby laughs. Best sound ever. So whenever he gets really into it, we can work up some pretty big laughs.

Speaking of the back of his head, still flat. The bumpers are doing wonders for keeping him on his side the entire night. (Unfortunately, Brody leaks out of his diaper when he's on his side... so we're going through a pair of jammies, a sheet and mattress pad every night.) His doctor's appointment is on the 15th, so we'll have to chat about what's our next move because poor kid has a super noticeable flat head.

Things are still going super great with his daycare. Our daycare lady Pam says Brody loves to watch the older boys play and starts to fuss if he can't see what's they're doing. As long as they're all in the same room, Brody's completely entertained by them.

Click here to check out more of Brody's 3 month pictures on my Facebook page!

Tuesday, March 19, 2013

My Parents: The Original Pintesters Circa 1990

I absolutely LOVE upcycled kids toys. Whether it's as simple as a fresh coat of paint or turning an ugly entertainment center into a tiny kitchen... love it. I'm also in awe of people who can take any object and see it for something completely different. You know, like "these black coasters will make great stove burners!" Yeah, those people. I want to be you.

I can't wait until Brody is interested in toys other than his epileptic singing sun. I'm already starting to skim through Craigslist looking for some super cheap furniture just waiting for some TLC and a glue gun.

Since Brody is going to be a year old in less than 8 1/2 months, I've already started planning his birthday both in my mind and on Pinterest. (No judging.) I'm pretty sure I need to make him something super awesome... whether he's old enough to play with it by then or not.

Way back in my youth (1990), my parents made my sister and I this humungous Barbie house. Dad built the entire house from scratch and even included the appropriate carpet and wallpaper for each room that matched the house we were in at the time. Bad ass, I know.

My parents were Pinteresting way before it was cool.

I think my parents actually still have this packed in the attic... which only means one thing:

Brody needs a sister.

Check out these other super cool DIY upcycled kids toys:

1. Picnic Table Redo by Caroline Frei  2. Reversible Lego Playtable by Sascha Romeo  3. Toy Grill by Kate's Creative Space  4. Manly Play Kitchen by McBaby Bump3  5. Toy Kitchen by Green Your Decor  6. Repainted Little Tykes Playhouse by Little Bee Mama  7. Dress Up Station by Vintage Revivals  8. Refashioned Batmobile Cozy Coupe by Sweet CS Designs  9. Toy Kitchen by Young House Love  10. Toy Tool Work Bench by Giggleberry Creations

Friday, March 15, 2013

Photo-A-Day Challenge | Mar 8 - 14

I really enjoyed doing my picture-a-day project last year and decided to do it again... this time with a little twist. The #FMSPhotoADay challenge was created by Fat Mum Slim and each day presents its own topic/theme. Below are my photos from March 08 - 14:

MAR 08: Brody is my favorite little man... ever. MAR 09: A 6'2" Dutch lady in sweatpants is not recognized for her face. MAR 10: Zora's a huge begger... especially when there are 6 different kinds of new doggy treats sitting on the cupboard. MAR 11: The most important thing in my life is this lil guy. We got a lot of lovin' to squeeze into a couple hours each evening. MAR 12: Zora's a little anti-social sometimes during movie night. MAR 13: Brody's fascinated by his sun that blinks and plays music... although mommy is a bit concerned about strobe-like baby toys. Epilepsy, anyone? MAR 14: Well, Brody thinks so anyways. Have you ever tried formula? OMG. I had to immediately go brush my teeth to get rid of the dry heaves. Bleh!

Wanna do the #FMSPhotoADay challenge with me? Comment with your blog URL or Instagram/Twitter handle... however you're going to post.

Thursday, March 14, 2013

Mommyhood: Week 15

Lil Tank is 15 weeks old today. He's grown so much over the last few weeks... it's incredible. Brody is attentive to everything... follows sounds, movement, anything that sparks his interest. His neck muscles are so strong, he's starting to grab and hold onto his toys, sometimes pushes his binky back in his mouth and loves to chew on his hands now that he's teething.

Speaking of growing... this is Lil Tank busting out of a 9 month sleeper. I guess digging out the 12 month clothes is now on this weekend's agenda. Thank God Mom and I are going to a Mom-2-Mom sale on Saturday.

Spent some time at mom's this past Saturday. Miss Zora came with... so as usual, it was a crazy shit show. Someday she'll learn that Peanut isn't a playmate and Zayla hates her legs being nipped at. Someday.

I also created a monster. I let Zora She's taken over the couches at home, but only with a sheet down first. She decided to make herself at home on mom's living room furniture. Whoopsies.

Also spent some time looking through old photos for a future blog post. Found this little gem from a Father-Daughter Dance... kindergarten... first grade, maybe? Jesus. 

Brody and I decided to play the emotions game yesterday while waiting for daddy to get home from work. Ok, he was just trying to work out a poop and I was making stupid faces. Whatever. Same thing.

Brody's also a huge bull shitter. I'm not even joking. Kid will all of a sudden go hysterical and let out blood curdling screams for 5 minutes solid, then stop.... stare right at you... and release his infamous shit eating grin. He does it with bedtime too. Passes out hard core during his bottle, doesn't even flinch when you're banging on his back to get a burp outta the lil zombie, sleeps through a diaper and clothes change.... then as soon as you lie him down and close the door... he's wiiiiiiiiiiiiide awake. WTF kid?!

The time change has also been pretty rough on him. Fell asleep around 5:30 both Sunday and Monday night instead of his usual 7:00. Funny thing is, still sleeps like a rock until 6 AM. Yes parents, Lil Tank sleeps 12+ hours straight every single night. Has since roughly week 3 or 4. Go ahead. Be super jealous. Definite perk always getting a full night's sleep.... however, it means squeezing cuddles, playtime, feeding, tummy time and a bazillion kisses into the 2 hours we get to spend with him in the evening. :(

I'm getting sooooo sleeeepy... NOPE! Just kidding!

Let's see... what else has been going on lately.... Brody's head is still super flat. Gah. I wish you could just squeeze and mold it like Play-Doh. His new daycare is going super well! Her name is Pam and she lives just a block over from us. She only has 3 other kids so it's a lot less commotion and more individual attention. She actually spends time holding and playing with him as oppose to first daycare lady who strapped him in a seat all day. Brody's always smiling when I pick him up and Pam comments on how happy he is all day. So I'm glad it's working out.

Mom still watches Brody on Tuesday. I love not having to drop him off at a daycare, but it really makes me not want to go to work. I feel like I'm missing out on a little party happening at my house all day. This week Mama Z did my laundry, cleaned the house, made dinner and gave Brody a bath. Yeah, I have the best mom ever. She's the shit.

Accidentally left Brody is his cloth diaper overnight on Tuesday. Because he sleeps for so long, we always use disposables at night, but a blonde moment makes for a very soggy baby in the AM. Hungry and saturated in his own pee, this kid still wakes up cooing and smiling. #bestbabyever.

Friday, March 8, 2013

Mommyhood: Week 14

That's right, Brody is 14 weeks already. Holy crap. And do you wanna take a stab at what the tank precious little one weighs?! He weighed in at 17 pounds yesterday! 17! Dear future c/o 2030 athletes... my son will squash you. (2030. Wow, if that doesn't make you feel old...)

Anyways, we had my nephews 4th birthday party on Sunday. Brody was definitely smothered in kisses. We decided to dress him up as a giraffe that day. My mom had bought me this awesome giraffe onesie like 4 years ago... I think it was the first baby outfit we ever got. Anyways, it's awesome. Complete with tail, ears and whatever those little giraffe horns are called. Considering he's already growing out of half his 6-9 month clothes, we figured we better hurry up and get him in it at least once. Hell, for all we knew, at the rate he's going, he could've fit into it in the morning and outgrew it by noon.

After the birthday party, we dropped Brody off at Grandma and Grandpa Z's house. My daycare lady had Monday off and since mom watches him on Tuesday anyways, we thought it'd be fun for Brody to have a sleepover at Grandma's house all by himself. I wasn't prepared to start having withdrawals before we even made the 40 minute drive back home. So yeah, I went two full days without my lil man and his smiles. Clay and I just kinda stared at each other like "uh, what now?" So we did what any new parents do when they finally get the house alone... we went to sleep by 8:00 both nights. Rock on old people.

I can't believe how strong Brody's neck is getting. Just a week or so ago, he was so against sitting in his Bumbo or play saucer. Now he loves them! He sits there and just takes in everything that's going on around him. How awesome it is to watch a child grow up right in front of your eyes. 

We are also being extremely cautious of putting Brody on his back. Between the forceps and being a "back to sleep baby," he has a major flat spot going on the back of his head. I mean, like bad. During our 2 month appointment, the doctor told me to keep him off of it as much as possible and then we'll re-evaluate at 4 months. So now he's spending a lot of time in the backpack carrier, Bumbo and play saucer. 

Nighttime is a bit tricky. We learned we have to wait until he falls asleep on his back before we can roll him over to his side. Even with bumpers, he still manages to roll onto his back throughout the night. Fingers crossed this resolves on his own and he won't need a helmet. On top of being super expensive and inconvenient, they also look really uncomfortable. :(

We even tried out his "big boy" bathtub... one of those booster seat looking things that stick to the bottom of the tub. He did okay in it, but kept sliding forward. I assumed he didn't like smashing the boys against the bar, so I took him out and put him back on his sponge. 

I tried to be a super nice doggy mom this past weekend, but that failed miserably. Zora is becoming a pretty pampered pooch. I mean, the living room couch has basically turned into a very large, expensive doggy bed. So I figured the transition from the couch all evening to a couple blankets on a plastic crate all day was probably a little rough on her Highness. I took a couple old bed pillows and pillow cases that I was planning on getting rid of anyways, sewed them together and made a plush little bed for the bottom of her crate. By noon she had chewed off one of the corners and by 4:00 the entire thing was shredded into multiple pieces. You dumb dog. I give up. This is why we can't have anything nice.

Thursday, March 7, 2013

Photo-A-Day Challenge | Mar 1 - 7

I really enjoyed doing my picture-a-day project last year and decided to do it again... this time with a little twist. The #FMSPhotoADay challenge was created by Fat Mum Slim and each day presents its own topic/theme. Below are my photos from March 01 - 07:

MAR 01: "L" is for the bazillion loads of laundry I have every week. How do two adults, a baby and a dog create so much laundry!? MAR 02: I love my Michigan string and nails canvasMAR 03: Even though my great-grandma passed away several years ago, I still can't take her house key off my keyring. MAR 04: I kicked Clay's ass in Chocolate-opoly. Definitely luck. MAR 05: Zora loves her little "tent" under the kitchen table. MAR 06: Brody's getting so big! He loves his Bumbo seat. MAR 07: Scary movie night while catching up on freelance projects.

Wanna do the #FMSPhotoADay challenge with me? Comment with your blog URL or Instagram/Twitter handle... however you're going to post.

Monday, March 4, 2013

Photo Contest - Please Vote!

Sooooooo I entered Brody's picture in a photo contest on

You should vote for him. He's adorable. And he wants $200. (College is expensive, ya know!)

So vote. Every day. Through March 10.

Saturday, March 2, 2013

Reese's Fudge Bites Recipe

  • 1/2 C. coconut oil
  • 1/2 C. cocoa powder
  • 1/2 C. peanut butter (or almond butter)
  • 1/4 C. honey (or maple syrup)
  • 1/2 tsp. vanilla

Melt coconut oil. Blend all ingredients together thoroughly until smooth. I used a greased mini-muffin pan, but you can also use paper-liners in a regular size muffin pan. Chill for 30 minutes or freeze for 10 minutes. Stores in an air-tight container in refrigerator.

Nutrition facts based on 24 mini fudge bites:
83 calories, 7g fat, 35g sodium, 6g carbs, 3g sugar and >2g protein each

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